viernes, 6 de marzo de 2009

CURSO DE FORMACIÓN BASICA PARA HOMBRES






(COMIENZA EL 16 DE  MARZO  DE 2009. 

CUPOS LIMITADOS)

 



SEDE: INSTITUTO DE FORMACIÓN HUMANA EN DEFENSA DE LA BUENA CONVIVENCIA.

Objetivo pedagógico: Curso de formación que permite a los hombres desarrollar esa parte del cuerpo de la que ignoran su existencia, es decir, EL CEREBRO.

Los costos los pagarán sus adorables mujeres agradecidas, una vez aprobado cada módulo.

 


* MÓDULO 1: CURSO PROPEDÉUTICO OBLIGATORIO
1. Cómo aprender a vivir sin su madre (2000 horas).
2. 'Mi mujer NO es mi madre, NI es la criada' (3000 horas).
 
3. Ser papá más allá de dar un espermatozoide.  (3000 horas).


* MÓDULO 2: Vida de a dos. 
1. Cómo tener hijos sin volverse celoso (150 horas).
2. Cómo superar el síndrome de pertenencia sobre el control remoto (550 horas).
3. Técnicas para NO mear fuera del inodoro (300 horas). OBLIGATORIO. Ejercicios prácticos en DVD.
1. Cómo entender que los zapatos nunca van solos hasta el armario(800 horas)
2. Cómo llegar hasta el canasto de la ropa sucia sin perderse (500 horas).
3. Cómo sobrevivir a un simple resfriado sin agonizar. (100 Horas)
 


* MÓDULO 3: TIEMPO LIBRE
1. Cómo planchar una camisa en menos de dos horas (ejercicios prácticos)..
2. Cómo digerir cerveza, gaseosa ó cualquier otra bebida sin eructar en la mesa (ejercicios prácticos, con un experto gastroenterólogo como invitado).
 


* MÓDULO 4: Curso de Cocina
- Nivel 1 (principiantes): Los electrodomésticos: ON= encendido, OFF= apagado.
- Nivel 2 (avanzado): Mi primera sopa instantánea sin quemar la casa. Ejercicios prácticos: Hervir el agua.
 

CURSO INTENSIVO:

POR RAZONES DE DIFICULTAD Y DE ENTENDIMIENTO DE LOS TEMAS, EL CUPO ES DE MAXIMO DE 8 PARTICIPANTES. 

TEMA 1: Último descubrimiento científico: Cocinar y tirar la basura NO provoca impotencia ni cuadriplejia (prácticas en laboratorio). 

TEMA 2: Cómo bajar la tapa del inodoro paso a paso (Clase Teórica-práctica, con repaso durante una semana). 

TEMA 3: El rollo de papel higiénico: Leyenda ó realidad .- ¿ El papel higiénico nace empotrado en la pared, al lado del inodoro?. 'Cómo cambiar el Tubo vacío'. (Teleconferencia con la Universidad de Harvard). 

TEMA 5: Por qué NO es un delito REGALAR FLORES a su pareja aunque lleve muchos años con ella. 

TEMA 6: Uno y la electricidad: Ventajas económicas de contactar a un técnico competente para las reparaciones, aún para las más básicas. 

TEMA 7: Rompiendo el mito: Los hombres que conducen pueden pedir información si se pierden, sin correr el riesgo de parecer impotentes. (IMPACTANTES TESTIMONIOS). 

TEMA 8: No es necesario agitar las sábanas después de haber emitido gases intestinales (ejercicios de reflexión). 

TEMA 9: La plancha II: Ubicación en el armario después de usarla. 

TEMA 10: Los detergentes: Dosificación, consumo, utilización... Prácticas para evitar daños irreparables a la casa. 

TEMA 11: La lavadora de ropa: Ese gran misterio del hogar. 

TEMA 12: Diferencias fundamentales entre el cesto de la ropa sucia el colgador del baño y el piso (Ejercicios en laboratorios con musicoterapia). 

TEMA 13: El hombre en el asiento del acompañante: Es posible no hablar ó agitarse convulsivamente mientras ella conduce y/o se estaciona  (Ejercicios con Yoga).. 

TEMA 14: La taza ó vasos del desayuno, comida ó cena: ¿Los utencilios se desplazan solos hasta la pileta de la cocina? Ejercicios dirigidos por David Copperfield. POR ARTE DE MAGIA. 

TEMA 15: Analizar a profundidad las causas anatómicas, fisiológicas y/o psicológicas que no le permiten al hombre secar el baño después de ducharse

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